Proverbs 31 Wife: Serving where God puts you.

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A few weeks ago, during praise and worship at church, we sang a song and in the lyrics was something like this:  “God is asking, ‘Whom shall I send.”  Will you answer “Lord send me.”  I was worshipping the Lord and that turned into my prayer, “Lord, send me, I will go.”  In my heart, I was sincere and I meant, I will go anywhere.  I will do anything you call me to do.  Be a foreign missionary (that’s what I always wanted to do), move across the country, whatever it takes.

I heard a still, small voice whispering in my spirit, “Yes, but will you stay?”

I knew exactly what the Lord meant. When we offer ourselves up to God and His will, we expect it to be great.  And it is great.  Living out God’s purpose for my life is the greatest thing there is.  But, it’s not always great in the world’s eyes.  Not always great in our society’s eyes.

You see, I know exactly what God has called me to do.  He has called me to be a full-time wife/mother/homemaker.

I once had a working mother tell me that she works so that her sons will know what a “real” woman should look like, what a “strong” woman should look like.  Ouch.  The comment hurt, but really it’s a pretty good view of how our society as a whole views the difference between stay at home moms and working moms.  Women who are full-time mothers are seen as less than in our society, and that can cause us to second-guess ourselves:  Maybe they’re right, and my job isn’t valuable enough.  Maybe I should always be striving to do more.

So, even though in myself I’m perfectly content as a stay at home mom, sometimes I want more.  I want Him to call me to do something great, something that this world and society would recognize as having value.  In the process, I forget that raising these two boys to follow Him and work for His kingdom is great.

I love the words of C.H. Spurgeon here:

Therefore be not discontented with your calling. Whatever God has made your position, or your work, abide in that, unless you are quite sure that He calls you to something else. Let your first care be to glorify God to the utmost of your power where you are. Fill your present sphere to His praise, and if He needs you in another He will show it you. This evening lay aside vexatious ambition, and embrace peaceful content.

Psalm 127:3-5 says that children are a heritage from the Lord.  It goes on to say that they are “like arrows in the hand of a warrior.”  I love this verse, because it really reminds me of the importance of raising my children to be on the right side of the battle.

There is a war going on, and there are only two sides.  Jesus said, “He who is not with me, is against me.” (Matthew 12:30).  My children are like mighty arrows in the hands of the warrior.  But which warrior’s hands?  Will they be like arrows in the hands of good or evil?  I believe it’s my job to teach them.  And, I don’t care what this consumer-drive, on-the-go, drive-thru society has to say about it.

I’m reminded of the story of Mary and Martha.  According to our society, Martha would have been the more respected one.  She was on the go, on the move, with a “real” tangible job.  We live in a society that says we don’t need to waste time at the feet of Jesus.  We need to fill every second with some real, tangible job or activity.

But, Jesus spoke differently.  He said, “Martha, Martha, you are worried and troubled about many things.  But one thing is needed, and Mary has chosen that good part, which will not be taken away from her.” (my emphasis).

The point is this:  one thing is needed.  Jesus.  All we need is Jesus, and all we need to be fulfilled in this life is to follow God’s will for us.  All the other fluff that society says we need, can fall by the wayside.

Please Note:  I am NOT judging working moms.  Instead, my goal is to encourage working mothers and stay at home mothers alike–only one thing is needed–follow God’s calling.  If that’s to work, then work.  If that’s to stay at home and raise your family, then do it “heartily, as to the Lord and not to men.  Knowing that from the Lord you will receive the reward of the inheritance, for you serve the Lord Christ.”  (Colossians 3:23-24).  The point is that there is only ONE whose approval is needed.

Lord, help me not to trouble myself with the many things.  Instead, help me focus on the ONE THING that really matters—serving you.

(Also check out: the Better Mom, Raising Mighty Arrows, Delightful Homemaking, Homemaker by Choice, Homemaking, the unveiled wife )


  1. says

    I cannot express in words what this post has meant to me today. I have been dwelling on this very thing for months! Bless you for this post! Such an encouragement.

  2. says

    This is a wonderful post. My theme for my blog of late has been stay at home motherhood. Would you mind if I reblog this, giving full credit to you, of course. This will fit in so well with the message I feel led to share. My blog is rather fledgling, so I don’t have a lot of readers…yet. Thank you!

  3. Anonymous says

    YES!! This is wonderful—thank you! I’m so glad you linked up with my Homemaking Link-Up—what a great addition!

    Have a lovely week,


  4. says

    I don’t think my last comment went through because I forgot to put all my info in! Ha! :) Anyway, just wanted to say that you are right on in this post…the Lord showed me the same thing about 5 years ago and what a blessing it’s been knowing I’m right where he wants me! :) Thanks for sharing your heart and for linking up with my Homemaking Link-Up Weekend.

    Have a lovely week!


  5. says

    Here I am Lord, Is it I Lord?
    I have heard You calling in the night.
    I will go Lord, if You lead me.
    I will hold Your people in my heart.

    Your post reminds me of my favorite hymn, “Here I Am, Lord” Every time I hear this song, it brings me to tears. Especially in the context of being a SAHM.

    Isn’t it a beautiful and “saving” experience to understand God’s calling? I feel so blessed that God has called upon me to be my family’s keeper. There is no job, position, role, title or responsibility that bears greater meaning.

    Like you, I am humbled and joyful to follow God’s calling to be a full time wife/mother/homemaker.

    Discovering posts like this is the exact reason why I am on this blogging platform and why I created Mama Bear Matters: I want to reach out to, connect with and celebrate homemakers like you!

    Thank you for your understanding and thank you for this beautiful post.

    By the way, I love Psalm 127 too. I referred to it for my son’s baptism celebration.

    • Crystal says

      And this comment is a part of the reason that I love blogging :) Thank you so much for your kind words, and your encouragement! Now, I’m off to visit your blog :)

  6. says

    Thank you! It is so important that we encourage every mom instead of trying to say that our way is best! God has been reminding me that he works in all kinds of ways and that that is going to look different in other people’s lives. It’s a reminder to me to STOP COMPARING!

    Thanks much!

  7. Joni says

    I stumbled on this blog by accident, or so I thought! As a SAHM of 5, I have been struggling with the thought of returning back to my career as a nurse. It isn’t a decision out of need as much as out of guilt. I think the Holy Spirit is talking to me and saying I am where I need to be now. This article brought me flooding with tears! Thank You! I cannot wait to begin following your blog!

    • Crystal says

      Joni, I loved reading this comment! I found myself crying and praying for you as I read. I pray that God will guide you in your decision and bless you as you follow Him in whatever He would have you to do. God bless you and your family!

  8. says

    This is my first time to your blog, and I’m glad I came across this post while I was here! I feel like I’m in this place today. My husband and I both entered graduate school just before we were married earlier this year. I’m having a hard time balancing my calling to graduate study (in my case, a 5 year program that leaves little time for home life and openly discourages women from having children) and our eagerness to start a family.

    I know that He has a plan in this, and that it will work out for the best in the end. We’re trusting Him to work it out, and we’re following Him wherever He leads us!

  9. Anonymous says

    Well I came upon your blog thru where else? Pinterest. Even though you and I are totally on opposite ends on our stages of life (I have 2 daughters and only 1 left at home who is in HS) I have been there done that.. SAHM and career Mom. I now have 2 daughters getting ready to have their first babies BOTH in July. (one of each by the way). Anyway, they both want to stay home somethin awful but their spouses would really prefer to have them work to pay for groceries etc.. I keep hinting around that it would be possible to stay home if they cut back more (one makes 55 g a year) As a Mother and MIL I would love to give advice on the subject but know I may step on some toes. As I tell my girls you CAN NEVER EVER EVER get back the time when your children were little. You miss out on so many wonderful things. Keep up the good work giving out advice. I think your doing a great job ! I will definitely pass on your blog to my girls ! Blessings !! Loyda

    • Crystal says

      Loyda, thank you so much for your kind words! How exciting for you to be getting two new grandbabies in the same month…and one of each! How neat :) I will say a prayer for wisdom and guidance for your girls and their husbands. And you’re right…with some cutbacks, we can live on so much less than what we think, and that time with babies is so important.

  10. says

    Visiting from WLWW, and so appreciate this. I’ve been feeling this lately. I have a desire to do something adventurous and “epic” for God, and am realizing He wants me to use me where I am at home with my kids. // Here I am, Lord!

  11. Joanna says

    Thanks for your encouraging post. Just wondering How can you tell if it’s God’s calling? I’m still lost if i should be a stay at home mum or continue working? I have been asking God but I’m not sure how to hear his answer on this.

    • Crystal Brothers says

      Joanna, this is a tough question! The only answer I have is to continue searching His word and seeking Him in prayer. Praying for you that He will reveal His will to you.

  12. says

    I appreciate your honesty and I pray that the Good Lord will fill your heart and mind with a great satisfaction as you bring your children in the Lord! In todays world, its like you are missing out on something but in actual fact you are gaining a lot and further more God's favour! Bless your life. You kids are privilege to have you as their mother!

  13. Anonym says

    Hi Crystal, I read your blog. Thank you for the post. Its beaitiful. Dear as I m stuck with same kind of a question in my mind from some time, I will be very blessed if you can guide me in this. I am single presently. I have acceptef Christ as my daviour 3 years back. I always had an desire to serve God. Last year I lost my job as the company I was working closed its office here. Then I decided to join ministry and got a chance to work with a Church Planting Missionary organization. Here the leaders are of the view that I am not ready for this work and have suggested me to get formal training. Sometimes I feel that may be I have taken an emotional decision. Now I have applied for formal training and awaiting reply. I am praying for God’s lead as I do not want take another emotional decision. I am at home now. I will decide whether to do mission work or job once I get reply from the bible school. As I was praying last month I felt like holy spirit has lead me to focus on how a woman should be. Yesterday as I was praying I felt a leading towards Proverb 31 woman. I would also like to add here that from a very young age I have always wanted to be a good wife and mother. I have always imagined to raise and nurture family. Now somewhere I feel this is what God wants me to focus on now. To prepare myself to become a Godly wife. Can you please help me to understand if this is what He wills for me.

    • Crystal Brothers says

      I can relate to so much of your searching! I, too, have made emotional decisions in the past. One of the things I’m working in my own life is to try and pray and seek the Lord’s will beforehand and make sure He is leading me and let Him go before me and not run ahead of Him–sometimes I get impatient, but it’s something I’m working on. Just keep seeking Him and He will show you.

  14. Bolanle says

    I stumbled on your blog and I must say it speaks to me on so many levels. I, like you heard God tell me to be a stay at home mom and write a book while at it and can i tell you how challenging that has been for me. While I enjoy being home with my son and being a loving wife to my husband. I feel my independence and money calling me back into the world and it takes everything in me to not go back. I have finished my book but haven’t heard anything more from God so i’m getting impatient and deciding to do things on my own. Today has been very challenging because i broke down and started looking for jobs even though i know that’s not what i’m supposed to do. ( I don’t know if you were ever in my situation where you had to give up a lucrative career to not having any money and had to depend on your husband ) if you were; how did you remain content and know that this situation is just temporary i.e the money situation and God has a plan.

  15. Veronica says

    I thank you from the bottom of my heart for this encouraging message. I have been begging God to use me in Ministries outside my home thinking I will do more good for Him not realizing just how discontent ive been with where He has me now. I am at perfect peace now with my position as a mother, homemaker and wife. I will live to serve my family and raise them in the fear and love of the Lord.

    Thank you.
    Veronica Poutama

    • Crystal Brothers says

      Veronica, thank you so much for sharing! Your comment has blessed me, and I’m so good the Lord could use my story and experience to help you in your walk as well. He is so good!

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